Pride night May 30th 2006

Yep that would mean that it was another gay pride in Madonnas court in San Jose! Man no wonder that lady loves the gays, we keep her ass in business hahahahah. It was like 50% gays i swear to god... and there was so much openess there, like holding hands, hugging etc... and it was NOT foreign. Shit why didnt i bring my ball and chain with me? I love those things, where we get to take advantage of the situation to practice them things we dare not do elsewhere.. ya know like the holding hands thing. weeeeee! Tis a good season to be a sister girl.

Oh man and at this concert was hot. LIKE sweat like a fat pig hot. It was gross hot at times.. like when we were up dancing and singing... The bitch had the nerve to turn down the ac because it messed with her voice lol. WTF. Woman were paying 500 thousand dollars a ticket, you can at least get a personal heater aura that keeps your own body temperature at like 100' just to keep you happy while we all are comfortable.. GOD that was annoying.. coming home and prying my clothes off with a shoe horn because they were stuck. EEEW! i wanted to throw my chonies on the wall to see if they stuck. LOL thats gross, but you get the point. Into the shower i went!

Madge is fabulous though... sexy, fun, bombizzle.. and puts on a show to make ya sweat... like a pig.

PAZ

Flyaway hair is in!

And so are the gays! So what a great weekend it was. Relaxing, fun, Drunky, Tipsy... yet I have NO real stories of me doing something stupid which is bazaare!

But lets get the break down going. So friday was PGA gay day. And man I realized how mature I have gotten. Before I reveled in the drama and getting drunk and getting all googoo over whoever was my flavor of the week back then. Now it was a us holding hands kinda thing with our friends, drinking yet never achieving the drunken status. Now can i tell you how gouggy them prices are? JEEZUS we spent about 100 bucks between me and alex alone! UGH!

I did see Kathy Griffin though. and OMGWTFBBQ I LOVE HER. We love her show on bravo, her comedy skits on Comedy Central and LOGO. So it was worth it all to see her finally, she is ghetto fabulous! You shoulda heard her cap on Paula Abdul calling her the next Ana Nicole Smith! HA!!

Other than that just went to Grammys for Sunday and went to beerbust as well. I dont want to bore you with the details. YUMMY! LIFE IS GOOD!

3 days!

JUST 3 days! OMG why cant we have 4 days! because then it would be just 4 days! lol. I need a vacation this summer. Like take a week off and just plan something fun in the sun. But where, when and with who's money? Shit i need a sugar daddy or momma. Some old folk with money bags to buy my affection and plane tickets! HA! just kidding, alex wouldnt approve.. lawd knows he aint gonna be my sugar nothing anytime soon, unless its Gimmeh sugar! lol

So This is a long weekend they say, but its too short in my eyes. Exciting as it may be, most will be bar b quing, i will be drunk I hope. So hopefully tuesday i will have some stories of me falling, talking shit, falling again and my mouthy bitches and the drama they bring.

Its gay day great america tonight. I am very excited as usual. ITs always a blast when you can go and be openly yourself with no reprocussions or looks... its rare that you can do that in public and by that i simply mean just holding someones hand or the occasional peck or hug. things most take for granted that we as gay fellas simply can not. We do that, we risk the shit talking folk, the stares or worse the fights from the insecure. None of that drama! So yeah good times tonight!

Have fun, be safe and enjoy this short weekend *wink*

GO TAYLOR!~

Woohoo! I LUB Taylor Hicks... hes the muppet moppet winner of the American Idol. And what an episode that was!!! Talk about all star power! WOOHOO! And we all know who was my favorite perfomer!!!!!! MY GOD I LOVE THAT PURPLE MAN! YAY, WEE, YIPPY, ETC!!! Even though he perfomed with the broke note twins... god im really starting to hate them. I forgot their names, they are hot but they sounded shitty... Its all good. Prince was in 3 sexy form last night with that voice... woooo! I can not WAIT to see him this summer /dance

Ugh that reminds me Madonna next tuesday!!!!! HAPPY TIMES FOR HAPPY GAYS! lol

Im all ready for the weekend!!!! are you?? Damn too bad i have to work tomorrow!

I dont want to Rock DJ

SO why the silly name. Well its a song by one of the English gifts to the world Robbie Williams. That song was so on fire when it came out. And that video was CRAZY!! I was disgusted yet intrigued and i love that man. Hot hot hot!. NUFF SAID. I am picking up his latest cd today to support his omgness

So last night I got into a long ass debate due to the fact that i was grouchy! ME GROUCHY! NEVER! So what did I do, i bitched about everything.. talk about PMS. Poor alex. Then we got into the longest debate over the place and I won of course. Because you cant out argue me, I always know what to say. UGH why am i such a bitch sometimes! Maybe i was hungry. He should have just offered a peice offering of a 2 peice and a biscuit to stop the crabby tyrade!

Oh well, todays another day!

Target the anti house warming place!

Soooooo yesterday we went to target because were thinking not pretentious but practical. You know stuff we would use and not super spensive. So we think Target right. Everyone has a target and accessable and affordable. So we go there to there little kiosk and we check.. hmm Club Bridal and Baby shower... We ask is there anything for house warming. She said no, Target was supposed to update their system for it, but they havent yet. What most people do is register as a club wed or baby shower for house warmings, and it works. UM HOW FUCKING IMBERASSING IS THAT! lol. We could just do baby shower and put maxxie stuff on there hahaha!

So we go Club Wed! HAHAHAHA.. well i figure since we signed that mortgage its just as binding as a marriage contract and since we cant LEGALLY get married either hell lets pretend =p.

So weeeeee... for an hour we go and scan and scan away! I was told 40 ish items to the list... and a variety. So we did...

To club wed you go online or offline to look up Reuben Aguilar as the groom awwwwww how cute! Im nearly married! Someone get me a tissue,im about to tear!

The lazy beast weekend.

Happy monday hoochies, bosses, friends, coworkers, ex-coworkers and other things that im too kind to mention on this family orientated blog.

So this was a weekend of the lazy beast. I spent most of it being home playing video games and lots of em. Lord only knows I probably gained like 20 pounds in just 2 days flat, sitting on my fat ass eating whatever i could shovel down it while clicking away~! HA!

Anyhow i nearly went to long beach this weekend. Nearly...but not quite. I had a free hotel and transportation home... so why didn't I go? Well friday night alex gave me this heartfelt speech on how much i mean to him kinda thing. And while i was going awwwwwww... how cute! i changed my mind and decided that we should do something together like a napa trip or somthin instead when we can.

So yep.. Love did it.. Damn bastard! I coulda been a hoochie this weekend too! JUST KIDDING! (puts halo back on)

Big folk

Today I had an epiphany of life per say. And it has to do with my own life and being a big folk. I decided that Fuck it all.. We have extremes... like Clarissa Flockhart and we have the other extremes like bean bag people... and where do I fall in? In the middle.. Am i a heffer beast YES, Do i have 2 chins? NO! THANK GOD. Do i need to get a lil thinner.. possibly? But for what? Do i need to look any hotter than I DO? HELLS NO.. id ruin EVERYONES GAME hahah.. Even Bee's game.. Cuz you know these milkshakes.... mmmhmmmm

Anyhow So its friday, all my bitches are going to Long Beach Pride and it hurts my soul that I am not going, even though i have the means to go... but i would need to take off today and monday.. and My boss would make me feel guilty and i wouldnt have fun. Cuz lemme tell ya, THAT ROBERT is a guilt trip KING. What your Leaving 5 minutes early? YOU JUST GOT HERE! lol.

Its all good its gay season again.. did you know we have a season? Were like Artichokes... except we dont live in watsonville and we dont give you gas.. LOL

Happy Friday!

80's music

Why is it that 80's music is SO timeless? I mean, what care free love me, lets dance and be silly rebels music would sound just as good as it did 20 years ago. I listen to it regulary and if you compare it to todays current music scene its message is quite different. Or maybe it was but more subtle... hmmm...

So my coworker just brought me a house warming present a slowcooker. And on one side its in french on the box. It says Mijoteuse! My crock pot is a mijo but beetle juice... MijoTeuse! rrarrr! im going to say its name 3 times and hopefully it will appear with beef stew in it!

Oh speaking of... I gained a pound /cry. Yep this fat ass has just got fatter... and here i thought i was doing well! Ugh thats just disgusting! Now i have to eat crackers and water for the next 3 days until i shed that unwanted libre of love.

Oh and I hate that fat chunk in the next cube because she wouldnt get me breakfast this morning. I guess im not MONKEY enough for her!

The housewarming Grue

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grue_(monster) Just in case you wanted to know what a Grue is... but it will eat ya. GRRRROWL!!

Anywho so now we have the final date for the housewarming. June 3rd which is a saturday. And Ive been asked to create a registry for the guesties for the stuffies. Which at first i thought was super tacky, and the more i thought about it, makes sense. There are things we could use or need and what a better way to spread the word.

Anyhow, so yes.. were finally set! The evite will be going out shortly.

Back to work I go!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NACOMIS OF MY OWNIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Moolah or the lack thereof.

Okay why is it that I NEVER have enough? With these gay events going on that ALL cost money.... i have to plan things ahead of time. Like if i go to great america, do i go to santa cruz pride? Which means new outfits, because fags JUST CANT WEAR THE SAME THING TO THESE DAMN EVENTS! ugh why do i try? im married, happy and have a great life. But these events entice me.... and considering i have 2 mouths to feed, i REALLY need to think about it lol.

So I think I should go to marshalls buy 3 shirts and a pair of shoes, skip out on buying the air conditioning for my place and just go swimming when its hot and go to ALL of the events? What do you think???

Or there is the alternative, I could take up my old job of being a hooker? I mean i am still supah sexy you know and theres nothing like being a cheap hoe to pay your bills that just makes the rumblies in your tumblies turn to happyness? LOL

Til Manana!

Toni Braxton

Remember her song "Heat" ... can ya feel the heat, the HEAT. Um yeah, so I can feel it, thank you Toni. Soo this heat is wonderful! It makes a fat boys sweat underneath their chichis for an extra weight loss regimin.

So how was your weekend? I know mine was fantastic! I did plenty of video game nerdyness.. had a killer bar b que with full on swimming saturday for an early Mommys day thing. Invited my cousin and his kids over and boy did we have a blast! Hung out with my drunken princess at the Beerbust even though I didnt buy a beerbust, but bought a couple Heffenweizens. YUM!

Oh and let me tell you something dumb about beerbust, I wore shorts right. And these shorts are 40's when i was a 40 waiste lol. Anyhow so they are big right, i need to scale down these clothes already.. Well i was sitting up on the damn bench which is higher than the rest of the patio seating.. And What I realized is they were so big that you could see my underwear from where i was sitting.. and i noticed it when I saw someone look right at the goodies. FUCKING BASTARD! i shoulda not worn any chonies, and fought them off with a stick HA! lol kiiidding.

So the weekend was pretty fun, tonights going to be a hot night. I will be in the pool as soon as i get home from the nice air conditioned workplace /cry Where can i buy an AC under 200 bucks? let a Mexican/Apache/Spanish fool know pleeeeease!

Happy Mommys Day!

To all the mothers out there, you hot sexy ladys... Thank you for raising us from brats to human beings! Without you, we wouldn't be here and we love you for it! MUAHS!!!!!

On that note, have a safe FUN weekend. BAR B QUE FOLKS! Eat like heffers because life is good!

MUAH!

Does this shirt make me look fat?

I guess that means, can you see my chichis with this size small? LOL

As a resident heffer beast, I think that one should accept the love handles, becasue there are enough skinny bitches who need a cheeseburger in california. And for the boys with the chichis and the girls with the pooch! Keep it real and love ya self. or should i say LOVE ALL of you damn fat self! shooo.

And on that note, I am hungry! I think i want mcdonalds? Ya heard??

On a more somber note. Did you hear about Soraya passing away. That is 2 dynamic forces in the latin music industry that have passed this year. First was Rocio Durcal who died from Lung cancer. And Soraya who had Breast Cancer. Its weird, I thought that she was on the mends from the disease, but bless her soul It was her time. I remember when she was diagnosed and then she disapeared for a long time. Came back with a new album last year... and so the story is told.

So LADYS get those mamagrammas, please. I know I tell my mom and sister to do so from time to time. It could save your life!

And to eat I go.

Oooooh I almost forgot!

i almost forgot to post a message!

So yesterday we were going swimming, i mean me and my sister. And alexs friends come over to visit. One of them was someone he used to date. Now at first i looked and said thats not abel... going into my house is it? Remember i was at the pool and i saw them come over. And low and behold! I was like what the hell is he doing here with Juan Jo. So was i mad yes, im a jealous mexican! LOL. Anyhow they all came down to the pool and while we were swimming they were hanging out at the pool. I was all no shirt and chichis and hairy beast everywhere.... oh man i did NOT want to get out of the pool... lol. Im a shy boy!

Unless im naked of course =p

I AM NOT AN EXHIBITIONIST despite what the pictures say people!

Have a good Wednesday!

Celebrate your Mommys folks!

Mothers day is on the way and for some of us its a time of celbration, for others its a time to pick up the phone and or some its a time of solace. I have a friend who just lost her mother friday and it breaks my heart to even imagine what she is going through right now. I know she has alot of support and is being surrounded by those closest to her helping her get through this. So baby, my heart goes out to you and you know im here if you need me for anything!

So with that, I want you all to call your mothers today and tell them that you love them. You should be doing that daily. I know if I dont call mine, she calls me and complains that I havent called her yet lol. But we take that for granted don't we. If one day they wouldn't be there, wouldnt you wished you picked up that phone and said mom, whats for dinner? =p

To my moms who read this and I know there are a few of you out there, I salute ya. Love ya, Want to spank ya... just kidding! but ive been bad.. so spank me instead.

What a weekend!

Wooooooh! Lemme tell ya, us mexicanos can party like a hooker! Lets recap the fun.

Friday: Went to Sals party, which was off the hookah! This was some goood ole fashioned drunken fun, capping, eating and overall yummy good times! Even lovey had some good times and thats a rare thing for him to genuinely enjoy himself. I got buzzed, but controlled and didnt get drunk... well ask the bag of jack in the box that same question! HA!

Saturday: I was planning on doing nothing at all but chill at home, when I got a call to join the girls downtown at 5 to go see Mo'nique. She is the mom on the Parkers, Funny as hell Stand up Comedian from Queens of Comedy. Anyhow wanna talk about a good time? LOL I was rolling, laughing, eating, laughing some more, drinking and did i mention laughing? Free ticket is a good ticket!

Sunday: Very impromptu bar b que at my house. I had a nice feast at the house which turned out well and yummy. After we were stuffed like a fat ass chicken, we went to Renegades for beerbust. Oh man talk about good times!! Then we went to taco bell..

So overall i did alot of things this weekend, but I can sum them up into 3 categories. Drinking, Laughing, Eating like a fat bitch on a cookie binge!

Paz!

Cinco de Mayo

Not going into the viva mexico tyrade today. Going to keep it simple and fun and easy today... JUST LIKE YOU! lol.

So today I am getting my teeth deep cleaned for the first time in my life. And am I petrified? YES! Am i going to cry, YES lol just kidding i dont cry unless you spank me... and thats not crying.... NEXT SUBJECT!

So everyone have a safe Friday! Hug yourselfs, Hug your friends, Hug your chichis and drink responsibly and if you dont drink responsibly... dont be driving biznatches. you know them copperitos will be out and about today looking for the swerve and out you go! POOF BE GONE!

Wish me luck, love ya all

Dreamz

So i had the weirdest dream ever last night. I dreamt that I was going to marry this girl for my mother because WE ALL KNOW that i would never marry a woman because i genuinely liked her. LOL. Anyhow so i kept telling my mom that im gay and i didnt want to marry her and she would yell at me like a crazy lady and say, YOU WILL GET USED TO IT! And would ignore anything I said after. WTF! Anyhow I dumped her in my dream because she wanted to have sex and i said sorry lol. And my mom had a panic attack over it because she wasnt getting her wedding. Well well well..... lol. What a crazy ass dream. THANK GOD IM GAY!

Todays Tidbit: A bird in the hand is worth 2 in the bush! which means were eating bird or was that bush? hmmmmmm =p

Mole of life is made with NUTS! lol

Are you ever not in the mood? LOL Like one of those don't touch me its not going to happen kinda things? LOL. Yeah, somehow it makes me more grouchy! UGH! Okay not that this means anything by chance... because this never happens to me. NEXT SUBJECT!

Video games... ah yes, my bread and butter... um light spread and butter (cuz fat girls need to be on a diet). Why am i addicted to video games still? I think I need to have a psychic reader come and tell my my future. I can see it now.... "You will be 88 and still playing the same game acting like your in your 20's" And I will say "Shat the Fug Up Miss Cleo, you lie like cheap headwrap you wear" Then I would punch her, ask her my future again... and she would say "Asshole you gonna die" I would say thanks! Tip her a buck fifty like the cheap hooker she is... and off I go to play some more video games!

The word for the day is QUESSO! I guess so! =p

Powerfull

So yesterday was a monumental and powerfull day. Over 1 million people joined the protest across the united states. The voice was heard. To all you who supported your people, your friends, I salute you.

So this whole issue is pretty scarry and its crazy to think of the ramifications if this does become law. 80% of the farm workers in Salinas are said to be undocumented. In other agricultural areas the population is said to be close to that number. We have many friends who are undocumented. And to think that they would be considered an agrivated felon is just insane. Alex has some of his closest friends who dont have papers. So this does hit very close to home for us. If one day this does in fact pass and these people do loose their jobs and the mass deportation begins, whats next? Whos going to work the fields? I can tell you one thing, this is going to be bigger than you can imagine. These jobs pay very little about $7 an hour for the hard labor. Whos going to take these jobs? I know that the add went out a few years back for jobs working the fields and one american applied. ONE. see the issue here?

Okay off my soap box :) I believe I am done with the debate.

Enjoy the hot day, after work im going swimming. Wanna skinny dip with meeeee? =p

Si se puede!

So today the rallies are going on in regards to the immigrant debate. If you didn't know, you need to get out from under the rock your living under =p. Anyhow, while I am not an immigrant I am a product of immigrant descent and with this i support the cause. I wear white to show my support, Myself and my family will not consume and we unite with one voice.

National information:
http://daywithoutanimmigrant.com/

And locally:

http://www.indybay.org/immigrant/

The cause is to STOP House Bill 4437 in which all undocumented immigrants will become felons and all those that employ, transport or directly help them can be prosecuted for assisting criminals. Un-F'n Believable.